I was there just all the lights out with a knife on my hand
and in that moment, seconds away from getting out of this life, I felt a deep gut feeling of no
I can say the first unconscious trauma that I lived in my life was when my parents divorced. I was two years old.
then at seven years old I was abused and, um, I even enjoyed it. It was something that felt good for me in the moment, but when it was traumatized in my body was when I realized how bad it was
At 16 years old, I was lifting 425 pounds in squat and all I heard was something popping in my knees